I’m not saying that chess is a metaphor for sex, but Charles being like, “I haven’t done this in a while”, and Erik retorting, “I will go easy on you”….

What I’m saying is it’s a metaphor for sex.


In the beginning was the Word and the Word was with God and the Word was a high-density pre-baryogenesis singularity. Darkness lay over the deep and God moved upon the face of the hyperspatial matrix. He separated the firmament from the quark-gluon plasma and said: let there be particle/anti-particle pairs, and there was light. He created the fish of the sea and the fruits of the trees, the moon and the stars and the beasts of the earth, and to these he said: Go forth, be fruitful and mutate. And on the seventh day, the rest mass of the universe came to gravitationally dominate the photon radiation, hallow it, and keep it.

God, rapidly redshifting, hurriedly formed man from the dust of single-celled organisms, called him Adam, and caused him to dwell in the Garden of Eden, to classify the beasts according to kingdom, phylum and species. God forbade Man only to eat from the Tree of Meiosis. Adam did as he was told, and as a reward God instructed him in the ways of parthenogenesis. Thus was Woman born, and called Eve. Adam and Eve dwelt in the pre-quantum differentiated universe, in a paradise without wave-particle duality. But interference patterns came to Eve in the shape of a Serpent, and wrapping her in its matter/anti-matter coils, it said: eat from the Tree of Meiosis and your eyes will be opened. Eve protested that she would not break covenant with God, but the Serpent answered: fear not, for you float in a random quantum-gravity foam, and from a single bite will rise an inexorable inflation event, and you will become like unto God, expanding forever outward.

And so Eve ate from the Tree, and knew that she was a naked child of divergent universes. She took the fruit to Adam, and said unto him: there are things you do not understand, but I do. And Adam was angry, and snatched the fruit from Eve and devoured it, and from beyond the cosmic background radiation, God sighed, for all physical processes are reversible in theory—but not in practice. Man and Woman were expelled from the Garden, and a flaming sword was placed through the Gates of Eden as a reminder that the universe would now contract, and someday perish in a conflagration of entropy, only to increase in density, burst, and expand again, causing further high velocity redistributions of serpents, fruit, men, women, helium-3, lithium-7, deuterium, and helium-4.

13 Ways of Looking at Space/Time by Catherynne M. Valente (via beholdatimemachine)





I did it. I found the ultimate tumblr bookstore.

why was green eggs and ham banned??

THAT  is a really good question

it was banned in china from 65-91 for its portrayal of early marxism 


Watercolor Collection: Women Defined. PART I. 

Ladies are awesome, don’t you agree? 

I wanted to make a simple collection of beautiful women in watercolor, so I did just that. Decided to add the accompanying text to give it a voice. My intent was not to abolish every stereotype, but to simply illustrate women of varying personalities, body types, ages, and ethnicities. Every woman is beautiful!

I will be selling this collection as a zine soon, but I had so much fun with it that I wanted to make it available digitally as well. Enjoy! 




It’s not about rape, but I feel the need to post it anyway. 

While it’s not about rape per se, it’s about male entitlement and the viewing of women as rewards/objects to be won, which plays a huge role in rape culture.

Hey, mate. Been a long time. Blizzard of ’68 I believe. Easter Sunday, wasn’t it? 
You’re not still mad about that, are you?
Yes.  {}